This Just In:

ESPnd: Clearly the best moment, at least the funniest, of this Championship Football Spin; Ray Lewis praying on the ground after the game with 100 cameras full circle around him and the CBS camera focused directly on his “Butt Crack”. Hysterical; proving once and for all that Ray Lewis is definitely an ASS! And, if he doesn’t make it as an NFL analyst he now has the resume and experience to be an excellent Plumber!

NDPop: Why does the incumbent president even have to have another inauguration? And, two this time because it falls on a Sunday? What a waste of a Spin and taxpayers money when he could be fixing his ceiling!

ESPnd: Did Woody Johnson, owner of the N.Y. Jets, listen to the Who’s famous song “Won’t Get Fooled Again” before he hired John Idzik, another capologist, to replace the capologist he fired in Mike Tannenbaum? Don’t they need a personnel guy? Is he going to say to T. Rex, “Meet the New Boss, Same as the Old Boss”?

ESPnd: Manti Te’o isn’t the Hoax in College Football. College Football is “The Hoax”; The Great Big Hoax. The Hoax on the American people and the millions of fans that live for it hoping somehow that it really is what it was supposed to be; a place where a student athlete can get an education at the same time and be a football hero; where coaches are great leaders, teachers, and molders of young men, and where institutions of higher learning actually care about education more than money and winning football games.

ESPnd: A private investigation into Notre Dame’s history finds that Knute Rockne and Rudy never really existed.

ND Opposite: Armstrong = Strongarm

NDpop: Baby Tourism has started to become a big business. Tons of Chinese women are coming to America to give birth to their children. Will this make us a smarter country? If the answer is clearly yes, then why isn’t it legal? Bring ’em on!